SEX PLAYLIST

In continuing the sex theme of my last blog, I made up a little playlist of songs, that either contain the theme of love, sex, or sounds like love or sex....

Ministry- Broken
A Perfect Circle- Thinking Of You
Orgy- Fetisha
Deftones- Cherry Waves
Stabbing Westward- So Wrong
Live- Voodoo Lady
Tricky- Ponderosa
Garbage- Sex Never Goes Out of Fashion
The Smashing Pumpkins- Once Upon A Time
Tricky- Makes Me Wanna Die
Incubus- I Miss You

INTO THE MIND OF A SEXAHOLIK....

Well, it is safe to say....yep....I'm horny.

But with good reason....yea, my girlfriend is miles away from me, and instead of cuddling up next to her, I am here in my hometown of Milwaukee, looking at pictures of her, while impatiently anticipating the 2 weeks I have left, before I get to see her again.

But like most smarty-art niggas like I, I do whatever I can to remedy that mental affliction, and NOT...through masturbation.

Through music.

Over the past couple of weeks, I have been working on two new projects.

The first being the first volume of the Renaissance mixtape series, where the concept is me documenting all my experiences good AND bad, before getting back with Adrianne, at what was my safe haven for a time....yea...the strip club...

The second, hoping to release on Valentine's Day, is the second volume of the Renaissance, where I plan to make a tape, based off of Kanye's new album. Don't get me wrong...I'm not singing...or planning to use the Robot voice...more details soon.

So where am I going with this? Well, it is safe to say, I am using music as a way to express more of my sexuality, especially doing songs for the ladies, and especially doing songs for MY lady. By no means do I plan to dumb down the lyrical ability, because I feel that I am at my best, when others try their damndest to try and decipher everything that I am talking about in my music, but let's say, that this has been the "sexaholik" coming out of me lately.

Over the last few months, I have felt like my sex drive has...decreased...I guess it's due to the stress of my everyday life, or the fact that I don't see my girl as much as I want to, or lack of creativity, or my deteriorating will to do those kind of things, more so cause I feel liberated relaxing and chillin', rather than fuckin' all the time. Yet, I truly believe that the best sex I ever had, has been....with her....more so, cause I have done more that I ever wanted to do with a girl, with her, and that she FUCKING LOVES IT!!! There's nothing like knowing there is a spot on your bed that will forever be there, because you made your girl...*you know where I am going with this*....

So, while I am waiting to express that again with her, I take every route possible, where it helps both stimulate my sex drive again...AND...boost my creativity again a well. I suppose over the last couple of months, I know what I have wanted to become as an artist and I want to use that to my full advantage. At the same time, I know of certain things I can do to spark the flame between me and my girl again in regards to romance.

Reasons why I have hesitated in the past, I suppose, it is more because I am such a reserved, quiet individual that if the mood is right...I will go ALL NIGHT!!! which is TRUE!!! Now, does that tend to the other's needs...maybe not...but if you don't feel it, you don't feel it...and the last thing I would wanna do, is fuck her the moment I get up...where my breath stank, and my eyes are crusty and red, and my voice is groggy....I wanna be refreshed, energetic, and ready to go...but I also know that as much as she initiates it, I can do just as much to instigate it....and I sound like Jesse Jackson, anyways!!!

I ono...I guess to each its own, but we are already in the right direction on how to get back to that...to what it was like when we were at her sister's house for the entire week...that is the type of shit I wanna relive...and winter ain't helping!!! But Valentine's Day is coming...so I will see what I can pull....*WINK*...But I am ready, willing, and able to prove myself that I can be a lover again.

WHY AM I GETTING TIRED OF HEARING DRAKE?

Now, before some of the Drizzy stans start pissing themselves from anger (TJ), lol. This is not a hate post towards this cat, in fact...I was lumped in the category along with many 15-16 year old girls who followed Degrassi (pause), and who knew that Aubrey Graham was a rapper, way before Lil' Wayne started nut-hugging him on award shows (The VMAs).

This had to be around what...late 2006 perhaps? Drake began putting singles out, mostly with fellow Canadian artists (Voyce, JD Era, Kardinal Offishall) linked with DJ Smallz, one of the South's elite DJs, and made Room For Improvement. 2007 came with Drake getting ready to end his stint on Degrassi as the infamous "Wheelchair Jimmy"...and a second mixtape was released entitled "Comeback Season", where he bodied popular songs such as Kanye's "Barry Bonds", Lupe's "The Failure", and more, not to mention high-profile collaborations with then partner-in-song, Trey Songz (no pun intended), surprisingly Rich Boy, Phonte of Little Brother, 9th Wonder, and more...

I thought to myself, man....this kid is TRULY the future of this rap game...then he ran into Lil' Wayne...

I'm not saying Lil' Wayne is the career-killer like some people I know of (Diddy)...but I just don't like when people act like every verse he spits....or sings...is the hottest shit out right now...I don't give a FLYING FUCK if he is clever...it sure as hell don't make it entertaining.

And since then, it seems as if though Drake is about to follow in his footsteps, because he has been more hit-or-miss, rather than consistent, but that is just my opinion. His verse over Kanye's "Say You Will" was madness, and his remix of "Swagger Like Us" was ripped to shreds. Hell, he outshined Wayne himself and everyone else that appeared on Dedication 3...YEA I SAID IT!!!

I guess my problem with Drake is that...I hear new shit about the same shit...in other words...I wanna see what homie can do, when he has a topic, or he's talking about more than what he has, and reflect more on his life and whatever struggles he had growing up and shit...even though, I don't believe he has ever had any.

I guess until we see that, Drake to me, will be the cat, that with all the co-signs, verses, mixtapes, and credentials he has...he will have to take himself out of the "one-dimensionality" that he sometimes pigeon-holes himself into...

This ain't me hatin...but I'm just sayin...

Download Mixtape | Provided by DatPiff.com

4 AND A HALF CORONA'S WITH A SHOT OF CLARITY

I have remotely, NOTHING, to talk about, discuss, reflect, or bitch about. So I feel as if though I must get my Demetri Martin on, and pretty much examine the dynamic...or what I like to consider....useless interests....

For example, last night, Thursday night, and the night before Thursday night, some like to be goofy and call it "Wednesday Night". Or if you cohabitate in the asshole complex, you will call it "Hump night". But anyways, those three nights combined, with a massive liquor intake, more than I had since my disastrous evening at the then Have a Nice Day Cafe, "Crazy Jamie" exposed itself ten-fold.

In some ways, it was enjoyable, I'm more open with my feelings, the excitement level in my self-esteem is raised to greater heights, I become "the most hugable, lovable, sonomabeech" ever. There isn't much of a difference between what I am then, and what I am when non-alcoholic. However, the liquor ignites some kind of spark or triggers some kind of randomness that isn't as different than the randomness that I expose to the world, through perhaps, everything that I do on a regular basis.

Now, the question that was raised by my girlfriend in her blog that she never updates..*wink*..is why do we enjoy the leisure of alcohol consumption only for our bodies to be drained of physical and mental energy later on?

Do I particularly have an answer for such a question....no....I just do it. It is one of those questions that no matter how hard you try to answer, you close your eyes tight, you scratch your head, or shake the magic 8-ball, you can't come up with a logical resolution. I guess to me, drinking is one of those activities or festivities that doesn't require solution. It is one of those things where I can throw up on your shoes...for five minutes straight...then e-mail you a Hallmark card saying that I was "sorry"....and we just laugh it off the next couple of days...

So I guess the question that I raise is....

"What about the dark side of drinking?"

IT STILL EXISTS PEOPLE!!!

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhSHdY2Rw8K4Odj2FA



And after eight boring minutes of this, watching these idiots try their absolute hardest to spew any kind of verbal negativity they could, while at the same time posing with their Wal-Mart rifles, something clicked in my head. Whether for show or for real, this bullshit still exists in the minds of those who don't even recognize how fortunate we are to begin a process of redemption for the eight years that we have spent making false promises and bad choices.

Whoever reads this blog, understand this. It is like I have stated before in one of my previous entries, that just because Barack Obama is officially our new President, that does not automatically mean, that the economy is going to get better like THAT, or that racism will cease to exist, or that he is not going to make mistakes.

If you WANT CHANGE....you NEED and HAVE to MAKE CHANGE!!!!

As much as we would want to depend on this man to mend our already shattering country (in some areas), it is all up to us as to what direction we want to take this country and to where we choose to head in the future.

Otherwise, sheer ignorance such as what is displayed in this video, will continue to run rampant and ALWAYS has the potential to get stronger as the days roll by.

So take January 20, 2009 to heart, for this opportunity we have has finally arrived!!!

The question is...what are WE going to do with it?

WHAT IT TOOK TO INSPIRE ME TO WRITE AGAIN...

These last couple of days I haven't really been active on here or posted anything relevant, unless it is promoting myself or the artists I work with, or things of that nature. Mostly it is based off a few things, that often plagued my thought process if not, frustrated me.

That after all this, ignorance is still bliss.

These next two days, are two that mean a lot to me, one being that it is Martin Luther King Day tomorrow. The other being that on Tuesday, HISTORY will be made. Tuesday, will be the inauguration of President-Elect Barack Obama.

Now, within the weeks prior to Obama's inauguration, I have seen and heard things everywhere, that somehow effectively changed the way that I look at my race, or more specifically, my "peers" in the rap game.

The belief that one thing is for certain...

Niggas would rather change the weather before they change themselves for the better.

Corny, yes. But other than that, this is how I feel. More so, there has just been lingering thoughts in my head, that make me believe, what does it take for someone to look at the opportunity that we have, and use the opportunities that we do have, and use them for the greater good. For example, why are rappers still talkin' 'bout "ballin'" when we are in what is known as the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression?

I know some of us, can't live without it (me...although I'm too broke to ball) but seriously, when you do shit like this, this is unexplainable and indescribable.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhH807hiUHbp56CGH3



Or...when niggas rob other niggas that appear to have squeaky clean images and then are robbed of their chains and shit...but yet somehow, manage to wanna transform into another one of the many fake gangstas disintegrating the black and hip-hop culture, based off the scare of their lives....

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhB7cHVzkUvPP7pzfu



And going outside of niggas, even the thought, that after the injustice we witnessed in the Sean Bell case, this still happens.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhE0dHVZnvi3Dxl8a2



So, here's the deal, internet thugs, fake gangstas, bad rapper/actors, police brutality, racists, the declining economy, the fear of what will happen in the future for myself and everyone, has molded me into having a very irritable, impatient, pissed-off mentality. One that for my art, will fuel what anger I do have inside, and direct it in a positive manner.

As I believe I had mentioned before in my blog, that it was Barack Obama or in fact the whole election in general, that had persuaded me to follow more politics, the positives and the negatives. I come from a neighborhood where our views are often twisted into what others would rather have you believe other than the truth itself. There are so many things that I have kept bottled in for so long, that I feel that NOW is the time for me to express that through music, especially if I sometimes can't do it here, based off of the disgust that I have for those that still allow others to look at the world in a negative light.

Tuesday, for me, means that we can no longer make excuses for being held back by others, it means that we have opportunities presented to us now that back in the day, we as African-Americans would brush off, based off of doubt, and it definitely means, that for us now, we HAVE to get our acts together, for I know that every action and every choice President-elect Obama makes, will be under a microscope.

Time will tell, but right now, I hope for the better, and the better is what makes me write again.

A NEW FEATURE ON ME AND THE UNDERGROUND MILWAUKEE RAP SCENE!!!

Last March, my friend and one of my many collaborators Bassey, aka Da Boss, interviewed me on my music, and my thoughts on the state of the Milwaukee rap scene and where I see it going in regards to the future. You can read it all on his blog.

http://www.airandseabattle.com

and while you're at it....go to this....

http://www.imeem.com/madstatic

a new track is up...hope you enjoy.

COMING BACK FROM THE WORST WEEKEND....

Well, a lot of people have wondered (or just Adrianne, newrapmusic, hiphophoneys) where I have been as of late, and why I have not posted anything new...mostly because life has been kicking my ass lately, especially over the course of three days.

It started Friday night, when I was hanging out with an old friend of mine, and apparently her friend, and her "boyfriend", and whatever. She called me earlier that week, wondering where all the hot spots are in Milwaukee. I invite her to this one spot called Suite. I hadn't been there but I heard it's been poppin' and from what it looked like, it was....not in this chick's mind though...she throws a fit the moment we get inside, rambling on and on, why playing Sisqo's "Thong Song", is a crime that should never be committed inside of a club. Well, honestly, I rather take that, than the redundant Gucci Mane shit I had to endure on my iPod today. Plus, IT'S A CLUB. So to satisfy her bitchassness, I decided to leave with them, onto what I thought would be another club, but instead we ended up in this tiny, wack ass bar, called the Cleveland Lounge, as I watch her nibbling her dude's ear, whatever the fuck they were doing, while I was rocking in a chair, drinking and watching ESPN, listening to the same shit I could hear on my friend's MP3 Player. I was just glad to get the fuck outta there.

Saturday, I was just tired and cold, but at least everything was easy at work. The bad thing about it was that Adrianne and I had got into an argument, but that was resolved. I applied this to a concept that I will get into another time.

Sunday, my check card was out of commission for 24 hours I suppose, as I couldn't purchase anything with it. Embarassing as fuck, and I guess it was based off a glitch in the iTunes purchasing universe. But that is taken care of now...least I think.

However, the positives of this weekend, was that after two songs that I have done to instrumentals from the 808s and Heartbreak album from Kanye, I feel as if though, I should make a mixtape out of that, especially now that I am working on at least four or five right now. Its strange. So I suppose I should write a verse to one of those beats right now.

Ill have more to talk about tomorrow (or later today).

PIMP OF THE YEAR!!!

SAIGON, STOP WHINING AND RAP!!!!

If you (like I) have had no free time other than check out these hip-hop sites such as Worldstarhiphop.com (which as of late has become "the epicenter of nigga-rance") you would have noticed, that there has been "vlogs" that manifest into the form of pointless videos, featuring one Saigon.

Now since his album has YET to be released, Saigon has kept kinda quiet lately, outside of popping up on a couple tracks, to throwing hissy-fits at record labels and Just Blaze. Even to a point to where he quit the rap game.

So yea, since then he has been making videos, yappin and yappin and yappin, and all this time I am thinking.....why ain't you rappin?

Don't believe me then check this out....



While this is an interview and I can appreciate most of the things he mentioned, this is going a little bit overboard...



Yep....absolutely nothing but steroid pumpin....

And if that wasn't enough....



Man.....nobody cares.......JUST RAP!!!

Can you see the shift in personality through these three videos??? Practice what you preach homie. Don't take this the wrong way, Saigon is one of my favorite rappers of the current times, in fact, he just MIGHT BE what NY Hip-Hop needs to revive itself. BUT, while he could be taking the time to make records of "Desperado", "Color Purple", "Pain In My Life" fame....he is instead doing.....this.

Bottom line is...I just wish NY niggas would get a grip on themselves and make music, instead of bitching and moaning.

I guess that one dude off of Rapmusic.com was on to something.

CLASSIC TRACK: ALICE IN CHAINS- WOULD?

I have been keeping this on repeat all day (well, not all day) on my iPod. This to me, was just one of those songs, that have that edge musically, but with enough harmony to touch the emotional portion of your soul.

R.I.P. Layne Staley