I'M USING THIS RIGHT JEAAHHHH....

to list the choices that i have for my design analysis that is due this Thursday (technically Friday 12:00AM)

James Montgomery Flagg - U.S. Military poster

George Lois- Muhammad Ali cover for Esquire Magazine

Ben Shahn- US Office of War poster (1943)

THE ALBUMS I NEED 2 LISTEN 2 ASAP....

EXILE-RADIO
DOOM- BORN LIKE THIS
REKS- MORE GREY HAIRS
GORILLA ZOE- DON'T FEED THE ANIMALS
JOHN ROBINSON- WHO IS THIS MAN?
X-CLAN- MAINSTREAM OUTLAWZ
P.O.S.- NEVER BETTER
ZION I- THE TAKEOVER
JOE BUDDEN- PADDED ROOM (need to finish)
B-REAL- SMOKE N' MIRRORS
HAVOC- HIDDEN FILES
K'NAAN- TROUBADOUR
PROJECT PAT- REAL RECOGNIZE REAL
BROTHER ALI- TRUTH IS HERE EP (need to buy)
CNN- CHANNEL 10
SAIGON & STATIK SELEKTAH- ALL IN A DAY'S WORK
JIM JONES- PRAY IV REIGN
SLIM THUG- BOSS OF ALL BOSSES
FLO-RIDA- R.O.O.T.S.


....lot of work to do....

I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WIT THIS FUCKIN' SNOW...

But it turns out no, as I am inside tonight early than what I should be. But maybe that is a good thing as I really wanna take this time to spend much-needed time on some songs that are either unfinished or non-existent.

Besides all that, today my photoshoot finally, FINALLY took place. Amanda and I got some good shots in. My facial expressions could use some work, but for that being my first time, what the hell eh? I'll let you be the judge when I put them out.

Man, I been fuckin' HOOKED on the new season of Making the Band. Not that I don't know that whatever I been fuckin' seein' in regards to Que and his "bitchassness" as of late, is affecting them to the point to where they gon' breakup...everything seem to be peachy. Don't believe? Check this episode of JD's "Living the Life" from two weeks ago.



But this is an album that I can't wait for, seeing is how not just with them, but a lot of the latest R&B releases from The-Dream, J. Holiday, Keri Hilson just this past Tuesday, and shit from last year (Ne-Yo, Musiq, Anthony Hamilton, Lyfe, Bobby V, Keyshia Cole) bringing traditional R&B back to the forefront, while all these Auto-Tune/Voicebox niggas (T-Pain, Akon, Ray J, anyone with low vocal qualities). Hell, I been more excited for shit in R&B than I have with the latest rap releases and there's been a lot of shit (DOOM, Reks, Jim Jones, Joe Budden, Saigon) Here's some shit from the new Day26 album on April 14th.

"I'ma Put It On Her" (ft. Diddy & Yung Joc)



"Vixen" (ft. Sean Garrett)



and because I feel this need to have more buzz than what its been getting...and cause I'm sure Adrianne will be curious...here's some new UGK, from their last album "UGK 4 Life" out this Tuesday...

"Da Game Been Good To Me"



R.I.P. PIMP C!!!!!

YEEEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHNO.

Why....oh why....is this nigga gettin so much hype right now?

How the hell does this dude go from gettin buzz, to gettin' shot at, to facin' murder charges, to get put in jail, to becoming nonexistent, to comin' back, to goin' back to jail, to comin' out, to now becomin' the shit since the Wayne effect last year?......and his music's trash?

Maybe I don't have a Cadillac or gigantic ass subwoofers to enjoy it, but it don't take a rocket scientist to know...niggas is feelin' Gucci Mane La Flare a little too much. You honestly believe that all the shit he got himself into, that when he gets out of jail, yall treat him like King Jafi Joesph? fuckattaheaaaa....



I tried all weekend that I was outta town, trying to know...what is it about this dude, that got everyone buggin'....ya know what.....I COULDN'T FIND SHIT....

The only good song that came outta the 30-40+ songs I heard was this one...and this one wins by default cause of the beat and the funny ass hook.



If someone can explain to me why this is? Please do...'cause seriously...I am NOT convinced...flow sound like he chewing marshmallows, he sound like he high out his mind ALL THE TIME...and his vocab...man, if I had to rap like him, I'd be better off with a learning disability...

I don't wanna sound like I'm hating or whatever, I'm not in the ATL...but...seriously.



Look at the high-fives after this shit...he make Eli Porter look like Rakim.

YOU DEEEEEED IT GUCCI.....STAY ICEY!!!

THE SIDE YOU NEVER SAW...

This is an interview conducted by none other than Rashida Jones (Quincy Jones' daughter, The Office, I Love You Man) that I think was conducted either weeks or months before 'Pac died. Listening to stuff like this, makes me 'shamed that people and even I when I was young never got a chance to see this side of 2pac.

NEWCOMERS DO NOT EQUAL LEGENDS....

And what i mean by that is that I am sick to death of the habit where artists come into the rap game and they don't even have a solid catalog (more than three albums) to even feel the need where they have come to a point in their careers where they have to plan "early retirement". We've heard The Game say it (only to begin making a new album as rumored) and Lupe Fiasco aka the king of the bullshit (i'm sorry I don't care how talented he is, he is an arrogant muh'fucka) with his last album, a triple-disc effort entitled "LUPend"...only to hop on Okayplayer and say he's got a couple more in him, before LUPend, sees the light of day. We've even heard Saigon say this shit...and he STILL has no album out. Now, the latest victim....an artist, with a little buzz right now, and new artist on Kanye's G.O.O.D. label, Kid Cudi.

"AFTER THE RELEASE OF MY FIRST LP THIS SUMMER, IAM NOT MAKING ANY MORE SOLO ALBUMS. IAM FALLIN BACK ON BEING A ARTIST. THE DRAMA THAT COMES WITH IT IS MORE OVERWHELMING THAN THE SHIT I WAS DEALING WIT WHEN I WAS PISS POOR BROKE. MY FRIENDS GET MAD AT ME, SAY IVE CHANGED, ONE OF THE ONLY HOMIES I GOT IN THIS GAME, WALE, IS WORRIED ABOUT ME CUZ OF SHIT HE HEARS. LIKE WTF? WHO CAN SAY IM BEIN HOLLYWOOD? IM NOT AROUND ANYONE BUT PLAIN PAT AND EMILE. WHO CAN SAY THAT SHIT? MUTHAFUCKAS TALKIN SHIT HERE AND THERE, SPREADIN RUMORS, MAKIN JOKES, TRYNA JUDGE ME, AND FOR WHAT? DOES MY MUSIC POKE FUN AT OTHERS? DO I TALK SHIT ABOUT PEOPLE N MY MUSIC? I ALREADY WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL ONCE, AND GOT EXPELLED CUZ IT WASNT FOR ME. IMA DROP OUT THIS SHIT BEFORE NIGGAZ TRY AND CRUCIFY ME.

I DONT LOOK AT IT AS QUITTING, FOR I HAVE ALREADY ACCOMPLISHED MY GOAL. I HAVE A SOLID FANBASE WHO TRUELY APPRECIATES ME AND MY MESSAGES THRU SONG, I GOT MULTIPLE BIG RECORDS, I HAVE RECIEVED WORLDWIDE CRITICAL ACCLAIM FROM THE BIGGEST TASTEMAKERS IN THE GAME, 3 FAN MADE BEST OF MIXTAPES WITHOUT EVEN RELEASING MORE THAN ONE MIXTAPE AND NOT EVEN RELEASING A ALBUM, I CAN PAY MY MOMS MORTGAGE AND HELP MY SISTER WITH MY NIECE AND HOLD MY BROTHERS DOWN WITH WUTEVER THEY NEED. THATS WUT I GOT IN THIS GAME FOR, TO ACCOMPLISH ALL THESE GOALS AND I HAVE. NO REGRETS

IM SORRY TO THE FANS, IM SO SORRY YALL. I KNO U GUYS WILL ALL HATE ME, BUT REMEMBER, IM JUS A REGULAR DUDE WHO WAS GIVEN A AMAZING GIFT, AND NOW WITH THAT AMAZING GIFT CAME MORE UNCALLED FOR PROBLEMS THAN THE AVERAGE HUMAN BEING SHOULD HAVE TO DEAL WITH.

I WILL STILL DO THE COLLAB ALBUM WITH CHIP, AND THAT WILL BE MY LAST STUDIO RECORDING.

IAM GOING TO FOCUS ALL MY ATTENTION ON THE HBO SHOW WHICH WE START SHOOTING IN AUGUST AND MY ACTING CAREER IN GENERAL…ILL CONTINUE TO DO SHOWS FOR THE REAL KID CUDI FANS, AND IM PLANNING A BIG CONCERT THIS SUMMER, JUS ME, AND I WILL PERFORM MY ENTIRE MIXTAPE FROM BEGINNING TO END AND NEW SONGS FROM MY ALBUM. ILL KEEP U GUYS UPDATED ON THAT

AGAIN, IAM SORRY, BUT ITS THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP ME FROM GOING COMPLETELY INSANE. IM TOO REAL FOR THIS HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL SHIT. BAK TO THE MOON I GO."

Now I don't know whether to look at this and think, sympathy or just flat out being a pussy. Now I know, I'm not where I wanna be right now in the rap game, and the things he mentioned in his blog, those things are SUPPOSE to happen when you become "semi-famous". People will feel you changed, people will talk shit about you, the labels will suck you dry, critics will crucify you...hell, I'm a nobody in the game and people do that to me. But hey, I'm doin' what I love and I wouldn't trade it for anything else. The way I see it is this, when you get to the point to where you're able to provide for your family, I can see where everything is cultured, but lately I been seeing too much of this from 90% of the artists in the game. Niggas' emotions gettin' the best of their judgments. Which lead to pointless beefs, boring tracks, and video blogs displaying things we care less about in this world. Bottom line is simple, before you can actually feel the need to retire, MAKE AN IMPACT FIRST!!!

"TOSS AND TURN"

I had never thought
Making love that's in such a
Sensual manner, with passionate actions
Exposed to your scrumptious, vuluptous skin

One in which is such a life-changing experience
A blessing that would soon end up being my curse in disguised fashion

Images once flickered revealing when those nights turned to day
When darkness reflected sunshine whenever you and I connected
When our souls joined forces, when our bodies became one

Everytime a kiss of mines entwined with your trembling lips
Your senses vibrated and pulsated
At each moment our motions coasted within the confines
of this waterbed, sending butterflies through your stomach
Your breathing matching the beats of your heart
As it rapidly increases with no letting up
No winding down accept the slow winds we make to Kelly's 12Play

I use to love that feeling of after i climaxed
From the way your mouth shattered the still frame of my pleasure
Breaking through the doors and burning down the house
You took this love and made it yours

Until that one day....

That one day, where my ears stand front and center
To the moans of you, accepting another person's invitation
of lust and desire, and maybe I wasn't the perfect boyfriend
Maybe I wasn't the best man, maybe I wasn't a soulmate
But you can't blame me for trying
And I guess in the end you wasn't havin' it
any other way but yours...
and in the process, you pushed me out the way
for a female.....and my best friend at that.

And from that second, I closed my eyes in
trying to erase every memory of us
and every thought of you that had me believe
that we were meant to be for ever and eternity
as your voice mails contain your echoes of yearnin' me
time and time again, your deception became timeless
My impatience, no longer silent
And my actions were now violent

Back and forth, we toss and turn between who's right and wrong
My screams became your rapture
While your cries captured
Me at my lowest moment in maturity
And here we are in the middle of a sidewalk of traffic
Arguing, pushing, shoving
Cursing, bitching, fussing
And in the end I can't tell who was hurt more

But I knew, I never wanted to hurt her
I wanted to love her
However my love was then and now for someone else
And she used it as a weakness
towards how I would treat a woman for now into the future

And even now, we both try to rectify the past
Through constant conversation
Until she rehashes the past over a misunderstatement
Such as a poem I wrote over the course of five years
She takes it as if I came to my senses

And here she is reliving those days again
of where we used to toss and turn within the bedsheets
Now I'm tossing and turning within my emotions
Until i come to a point to where
I don't know who to hate more
Her or myself?

And no matter how much i cut the cord
She keeps coming back for more
Cause apparently our discord is her discourse
For continuing her verbal intercourse with me
Hoping verbal would lead to sexual
But she's sadly mistaken if Ima fall for it

'Cause even though I can't look at her without an inch of regret felt
I can't even stand her for the pain that she had left
in the middle of our crossroads

And the fact that I even came close to it
Brought me to when I stared into my niece's eyes
And for the first time in years cried
'Cause I don't ever want her first time with a guy
to result in a busted lip or black eye

And I hope to God, that coming close stays to never going
'Cause when I touch a woman
It's when I hug my mother
Play airplane with my niece
Give dap to my sis
Or wipe my girl's tears away from the joy of being with me

So to the girl this is directed to
You ain't the first, nor the last that I say this to
But this is where the story ends, it's over, so stop tryin' ya luck
Guess you wished you never succumbed to that head and a fuck

(c) Mad Static

*YALL EVEN LOOK AT MY WORDS THE WRONG WAY, THERE GON' BE DRAMA...LOOK IN MY EEYYYEEESSSS!!! lol...playin'*

"YOU'RE SO SET TO FAAAAAIIIILLLLLL!!!!"

This new Lamb Of God track says it all!!! Or at least that's how I've felt in one long day. For one, the plans for my photoshoot for my up-and-coming, now untitled mixtape, was held up do to so many reasons.

1. My friend who was taking the photos catching a fever.

2. Her losing the camera in Glendale.

3. Her boyfriend's son having to be taken to his mother at 1:00 leaving very little time.

4. The model I had for it, couldn't even respond to a text or phonecall.

So, that pretty much left me in the dust and in disbelief.

Now, I understand there was a mix of things going wrong beyond one's control and miscommunication. Whether to be upset or hurt, there's really nothing I could say or feel and I am not mad at anyone....until someone says some bullshit or whatever. But regardless, I don't know why, but I have just been in this contemplative mood all day. Especially with this whole ex-girlfriend situation taking the forefront again. It's like I mentioned two blogs ago, this has been my inspiration to really...really.....THROW THIS BITCH UNDER THE BUS...especially if she's not only sending dumb e-mails, begging and pleading through the phone...and now...making myspace videos....WE USE YOUTUBE MOFO!!! I'm not even gonna post the link, cause I'm tired of making people famous off of my expense.

I don't know, but this has just been a day beyond expectation and completely fucked me up mentally with no limitations. Not only that, but it has affected me to the point where I'm just fed up with everything. The only good thing I look forward to is getting drunk this week, making money, and the most important thing of all, be able to see my girlfriend this upcoming weekend.

So maybe this is another obstacle for me to get where I need to be. That don't mean I like it. But what the hell can you do? Other than pick up the pieces?

......well...can it be that it was all so simple?

"YOU AIN'T NUTHIN 2 ME"

"Apologize 2 ya ma fa me. You on da udda hand, can choke on yo crooked dick !"

-signed by my ex-girlfriend.

Well sorry to disappoint you, but my head doesn't extend that far. I'll ask Chad of Nickelback, I'm sure he can give me some pointers.

CHANGE OF THE GUARD

You know what the whole concept of ex-girlfriends are? They are designed to drive you crazy!!!!

This last week, I always thought that I would be able to get through ten tracks with no problem. Talk about love, be all lovey dovey, get my LL on and all kinda shit...

I can't do that now...and I blame this bitch.

Now, I don't want to be bitter or angry or whatever, but I would seriously like to thank my ex-girlfriend, for giving me the opportunity, to be able to have SO MUCH MORE to say in regards the negative aspects of this little thing we call love.

Its those negatives that always outweigh the positive aspects of my love life, with that being the love of my life, and those negatives influence me to not only lash out at her, but the resentment allows me to lash out at everyone else including family and friends.

It's basically the last draw now. I've only made one track in regards to this situation and I hoped I keep it that way, now I feel like I can make 20 more...lol.

The bottom line is this basically, I want this project to be an all-around story into my head. Things that I don't say on here, ain't cause of fear, it is because my head is wrapped around in the present so much, that I lose sight of what I want for the future (if that makes sense).

So I guess in the end....LOVE HURTS....

But...as long as I have my love...I'm willing to deal with the pain.

THE-DREAM....IS HE THAT DUDE?!?!

Man...I gotta be honest wit you, I been more inspired and intrigued by R&B music lately than I have with rap music. It is just something about it that it can either be, soothing for the soul, or an element for your energy. Shit that's out right now from Jamie Foxx's "Blame It" to anything Ne-Yo puts out...gets heavy burn on my iPod or my other mp3 player. But everywhere I go, they keep sayin' the same thing....

"THE-DREAM IS THAT N****"



That's right....Terius "The Dream" Nash, along with partner-in-crime, producer Tricky Stewart, have written for any and everybody in the R&B game, from Rihanna to Usher to even Britney Spears. LOVE/HATE, The Dream's debut album came out around a year and a half ago...the moment it came out, you got people comin' out sayin' its a classic album.



But I won't deny, despite the obvious Prince influence, the often silly lyrics in some songs...there are some SERIOUS babymakers on that album. You know how much cutty I got to "Falsetto"?????



But as much as he is the shit on his own, when he writes for others, he brings the best out of those that he writes for...take Usher for instance..."Moving Mountains" was and had to be one of my top THREE R&B songs of the year...and unfortunately, the only song I REALLY loved on the "Here I Stand" album....well other than "Trading Places".



Now...his new album...Love vs. Money...is expected to be out sometime later this month...and according to posts on Okayplayer...Rolling Stone apparently gave the album....get this.....FOUR AND A HALF STARS!!!....whhaaaaatttttt???? (Lil' Jon style)



Now, I'm not quick to jump on bandwagons in regards to believing the ****1/2 star hype...but if Dream's got joints like this on the album....im keeping my fingers crossed, that I'ma have my new sex soundtrack for the spring time....

...which reminds me, I gotta peep that new Ryan Leslie, ASAP!!!

HOLLA!!!!

THE WORST WEEK EVER...(Not sponsored by VH1)

Well "Next Sunday" aka the beginning of March, could NOT have came quick enough. Come to think, it didn't come quick at all. Since last Sunday, I have been

A. Tired beyond the point of oblivion

B. Lacking sleep causing me to be tired.

C. Worked a horrendous amount of days.

D. Had a even MORE horrendous amount of exams (three)

E. As well as a project.

F. Gig gor cancelled.

G. I got too drunk on Monday causing waking up with muscle pains and incoherence.

H. I haven't written shit, except rewrite an old poem.

and....

I. My girlfriend's insecurity complex reached new heights this past week.


So, the question is, with all of that? Do I feel that I have accomplished things this week? To an extent, yes, to an even greater extent...no. Due to the hectic week I had, that had made me more stressed and frustrated with where I stand as a person and an artist. You know those stages where, you're like, "I love rap" one day and then the next you're like "I HATE THIS PART...RIGHT...HERE"(shut up gf)...That's how I am with rap at least at this stage in my life.

Even though, I feel like everyday, everyone else that I know is surpassing me in this rap shit, I know that this is something that I will NEVER stop doing, until I am unable to do it. As much as I tried talking to my gf about it, and as much advice that came out of the conversation, I still felt like, nothing was answered. I guess that's where I have to come in, so that I can be able to make the effort and put my name out there anyway possible.

I am proud and congratulate those that have come a long way (yall know who you are) and are able to get shows and get on records, but PLEASE...keep that shit to yourself. In the end, this is a competitive game, and now in this dwindling economy, it's going to become even MORE competitive. Make your moves, as I am going to make mine, and one way or another, we gonna be sharing a stage. The last thing I wanna do is come off as a hater or that I'm praying for others' downfalls, that's not the case at all, but the last thing that Ima do is kiss ass and follow other peoples' to make a name for ME, I never done it that way, and I don't plan to ever do it that way.

It's basically, I like your music, here's mine, if you feel it, let's work together, let's make shit happen, if not, then its whatever.

AND NOT....I like your music, let's do some shit.

So whether it is me, myself, and I in this local game, then so be it, but I sacrificed a lot to have my craft the way it is now...it's time to let the world know.