"TOSS AND TURN"

I had never thought
Making love that's in such a
Sensual manner, with passionate actions
Exposed to your scrumptious, vuluptous skin

One in which is such a life-changing experience
A blessing that would soon end up being my curse in disguised fashion

Images once flickered revealing when those nights turned to day
When darkness reflected sunshine whenever you and I connected
When our souls joined forces, when our bodies became one

Everytime a kiss of mines entwined with your trembling lips
Your senses vibrated and pulsated
At each moment our motions coasted within the confines
of this waterbed, sending butterflies through your stomach
Your breathing matching the beats of your heart
As it rapidly increases with no letting up
No winding down accept the slow winds we make to Kelly's 12Play

I use to love that feeling of after i climaxed
From the way your mouth shattered the still frame of my pleasure
Breaking through the doors and burning down the house
You took this love and made it yours

Until that one day....

That one day, where my ears stand front and center
To the moans of you, accepting another person's invitation
of lust and desire, and maybe I wasn't the perfect boyfriend
Maybe I wasn't the best man, maybe I wasn't a soulmate
But you can't blame me for trying
And I guess in the end you wasn't havin' it
any other way but yours...
and in the process, you pushed me out the way
for a female.....and my best friend at that.

And from that second, I closed my eyes in
trying to erase every memory of us
and every thought of you that had me believe
that we were meant to be for ever and eternity
as your voice mails contain your echoes of yearnin' me
time and time again, your deception became timeless
My impatience, no longer silent
And my actions were now violent

Back and forth, we toss and turn between who's right and wrong
My screams became your rapture
While your cries captured
Me at my lowest moment in maturity
And here we are in the middle of a sidewalk of traffic
Arguing, pushing, shoving
Cursing, bitching, fussing
And in the end I can't tell who was hurt more

But I knew, I never wanted to hurt her
I wanted to love her
However my love was then and now for someone else
And she used it as a weakness
towards how I would treat a woman for now into the future

And even now, we both try to rectify the past
Through constant conversation
Until she rehashes the past over a misunderstatement
Such as a poem I wrote over the course of five years
She takes it as if I came to my senses

And here she is reliving those days again
of where we used to toss and turn within the bedsheets
Now I'm tossing and turning within my emotions
Until i come to a point to where
I don't know who to hate more
Her or myself?

And no matter how much i cut the cord
She keeps coming back for more
Cause apparently our discord is her discourse
For continuing her verbal intercourse with me
Hoping verbal would lead to sexual
But she's sadly mistaken if Ima fall for it

'Cause even though I can't look at her without an inch of regret felt
I can't even stand her for the pain that she had left
in the middle of our crossroads

And the fact that I even came close to it
Brought me to when I stared into my niece's eyes
And for the first time in years cried
'Cause I don't ever want her first time with a guy
to result in a busted lip or black eye

And I hope to God, that coming close stays to never going
'Cause when I touch a woman
It's when I hug my mother
Play airplane with my niece
Give dap to my sis
Or wipe my girl's tears away from the joy of being with me

So to the girl this is directed to
You ain't the first, nor the last that I say this to
But this is where the story ends, it's over, so stop tryin' ya luck
Guess you wished you never succumbed to that head and a fuck

(c) Mad Static

*YALL EVEN LOOK AT MY WORDS THE WRONG WAY, THERE GON' BE DRAMA...LOOK IN MY EEYYYEEESSSS!!! lol...playin'*